If you look at the calendar you would see that Summer has officially arrived. I live in Canada and Summer is a traditionally busy time of year for everyone up here. Our igloos have all melted forcing us to become a nomadic people scrounging for food and shelter.

This time of year in Canada is known as “Canadian Seasonal Forced Colonization”. Even just a few dozen years ago the seasonal nomadic activities of all Canadians was a time of heightened dangers. With our family homes having disintegrated under the rays of the summer sun we where well and truly exposed to the elements. Polar Bears roamed the lands feeding on sick and elderly Canadians, while packs of Christian Missionaries converted all of those who could not out run the bible thumping “do gooders”.

If you where able to elude the bears and evangelists, most Canadians headed to US – Canada border where huge tent cities would seemingly appear overnight. People would cluster near the border in the hopes of pulling a wayward wifi,or television signal out of the air. With the new Digital Television requirements in the US, this has forced many of the Canadian tent cities to rely on books and newspapers – shudder – for their information.

Access to the Internet is a much sought after commodity during the migratory period of Canadians. Every year a black market springs up with people paying outlandish prices for the privilege to update their Facebook status. There is a rumor circulating in the tent city where I am,that Angelina Jolie Pitt traded a wireless network card for somebodies 4 year old.

I for one am grateful that this period of forced migration is simply temporary. In a few weeks when the temperature begins to drop again,me and my fellow Canadians will pack up our meager belongings, fight off the bands of bears and missionaries, and make our way back to our traditional hunting grounds. There is a lot of competition in regards to getting the most desirable spot for your igloo. I think I will start my trip back sooner than the rest of the camp. I have my eyes on a prime piece of real estate – it is right between the Tim Horton’s and The Beer Store.

http://www.outofthemouthofdave.com/2009/07/migratory-patterns-of-canadians.html

reviewed by Moishe ALEXANDER , CEO of canadian funding corp